I want to share a little about my experience with my DID. And how it affected my depression.
I've been having DID since i can remember but i didn't knew that it had a name until when i was about 14.
I thought that i had a hyperactive imagination and that i had some type of hallucinations with imaginary friends or something. But i got diagnosed about two years ago.
My depression started just at the same time my DID did. In fact. I have always been a trouble child.
At first i just couldn't understand it.
"My mind was divided?" , "Am i that fucked up?"
Those questions ran in my head for a long time making me go down and down on my pit of depression but then i just accepted it...
I Found out that i wasn't weird, i wasn't alone, i had friends, i had a second family inside me, they love me as much as i now love them. I found out alters can be lovely and lovable. They are protective and makes me happy to know that i am not alone. I never was and i will never be.
For me, having this illness has been the best that could happen to me ever. My family still don't understand quiet much about it the same they do with my depression, but they don't judge me and supports me a lot.
And even that i know i am ill.. I wouldn't change it for a thing. I know that my case is different from others, those with this illness.. we all have different experiences, but if in the future there is "a cure", i sincerely wouldn't like to get my alters taken away from me..
They complete me in some way as i complete them and i love them. They helped me throughout the years with my problems and pains, celebrating with me my happy moments and helping me remember it now a days when i feel down.
Many of us still need help, and help is out there. We just need to take the first step, this is for many, the hardest of them all, which is accepting that they have an illness to finally take the second step, Getting help.
